Endless Story - Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight:

Back then, when we met,
it was all awkward.
We went the long way, didn't we?
We got hurt, didn't we?

Until the day I reach eternal sleep,
that smiling face will
have to stay with me without fail.

Back then, when we met,
it was all awkward.
We went the long way, didn't we?
We got there in the end...
(“Dearest” by Hamasaki Ayumi)

“Haruhi!”

She gazed up from behind her damp bangs as Kaoru, Hikaru, and Tamaki rushed out of Kyouya’s apartment and crowded around her with worried looks etched on their faces. It was very transparent that they had been on a lookout for her after Kaoru made the call.

“What happened?”

“Are you all right?”

“Let’s get you warmed up.”

She pulled away from their arms when she realized that they were going to pull her into Kyouya’s territory. She said quietly, “I don’t want to go in there.”

She expected silence—that familiar silence those three lapsed into whenever Kyouya was mentioned—but instead, Kaoru placed an arm around her shoulder as Hikaru and Tamaki gave him a nod.

“Why don’t we go to your apartment then and you can dry off there?”

“You won’t need to come with me.” Haruhi protested as Kaoru steered her firmly to her door. “I can dry off very well by myself.”

“It’s only me,” Kaoru smiled at her gently as she hesitantly pulled out her keys, “that way we’ll get a chance to talk and catch up.”

She turned to find Hikaru lingering just outside of Kyouya’s door with Tamaki, both of them with unreadable expressions on their faces.

“I guess it wouldn’t hurt,” she let out a sigh as she unlocked her door.

“It’s small,” Kaoru commented as he entered her apartment for the first time. “Why is your apartment and Kyouya-senpai’s* so different when you guys are right next door to each other?”

“The apartment complex had been remodeled before,” Haruhi explained as she set her keys down on the counter where she usually kept them and headed for the bathroom. “They remodeled and added Kyouya-senpai’s half of the apartments.”

“They should have just rebuilt the whole thing,” Kaoru said as he settled on the couch comfortable. “It would have been a lot more professional.”

“True,” Haruhi said from the bathroom where she proceeded to change into a pair of sweats and a T-shirt. “But the rent is cheaper on my side of the complex compared to his side.”

“I suppose that makes sense,” she heard Kaoru’s voice faintly from the living room as she tugged the T-shirt over her head. “But I still think they should have rebuilt it.”

Haruhi gave a laugh. Their way of thinking was so different from hers that sometimes she wasn’t even sure why they were all friends in the first place. But she enjoyed being with them because she learned a great deal. Though how useful the information she learned was a mystery to her, she still enjoyed their presence.

“I’m sorry,” she said as she walked out, holding a towel to her head. “Would you like some tea?”

“No, I’m fine,” Kaoru waved a hand. “Perhaps you have commoner coffee instead?”

“Why are you still drinking that?” Haruhi questioned him as she headed for the kitchen. She proceeded into taking out the simple ingredients for the coffee and started to boil water. “You have much higher quality coffee you can drink.”

“It’s interesting,” Kaoru said defensively. “Not as good as our coffee, but it doesn’t hurt to indulge ourselves in a bit of commoner culture.”

“Whatever you say,” Haruhi knew that she wasn’t ever going to understand the workings of rich minds, so she didn’t bother. They were silent for a moment while the water boiled and once it did, she added a few scoops of coffee powder to the water and placed it on a small tray. “Well, what did you want to catch up about?”

She set the coffee down in front of Kaoru and seated herself directly across from him. She noted that he hesitated as he reached for the coffee.

“Nothing much, really,” Kaoru finally said. “We just haven’t gotten time to talk one-on-one, that’s all.”

“Yes,” Haruhi mentioned as she leaned back into the armchair. “There are a few matters I would like to ask you though.”

Kaoru’s hand paused in the air. After a moment, he placed the cup back down on the table without taking a sip and asked quietly, “What would you like to know?”

“Why are you here?” Haruhi asked him without waiting another moment. “And why are you all staying at Kyouya-senpai’s apartment?”

Kaoru sighed, pressing his hands together thoughtfully, “Well, I suppose I’ll have to tell you from the very beginning.”

“I have no objections,” Haruhi declared.

He was silent for another moment before he started, “Before Kyouya-senpai left for England, his relationship with his father was already at its breaking point. It wasn’t just Kyouya-senpai, even if he suffered worse from that. The entire family was feuding over ridiculous matters that involved even Tamaki-senpai’s family and my own. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, really…Ootori-san* was ill and was desperate for an official heir to take over the company in case of any emergencies. The candidates not only included his sons, but even extended to his nephews. He contacted Kyouya-senpai first, stating that he needed him to prove to him that he was the right choice—of course, all of the other potential candidates received the same call and they were all eager to prove their worth.

“It was hard for Kyouya-senpai to decide whether the company was really what he wanted in life. Did he really care if the company went out to his brothers? Or, even worse, to those that were not immediate family?

“He came to us one night, I think after a date with you, Haruhi, looking completely lost and it was the first time he had all of his walls down. He wanted to stay with you and throw everything away if it was possible, but all of the work he put forth in taking over the company weighed heavily against his pride. He wanted to take over the company. I think there was a reason deeper behind his desire to take over, but he never told us.

“He didn’t know what to do. Whether he should leave you—which sent him in a rage against himself—or whether he should just give up the dream he worked so hard for. It was all simple; really…we couldn’t understand his dilemma. It should have been an easy decision to compromise. He could have gone to England for a couple of months to work for the position and he still would have had you. We told him that you would have waited for him, no matter how long you had to wait.

“Kyouya-senpai said that it wasn’t possible. There was no way that he was going to just leave you hanging, waiting for months, or even possibly years, for something that may not even be his. He said that it was either you or the company. It couldn’t be both. He said that he already didn’t deserve you; what gave him any right to keep you leashed and to keep you waiting? He didn’t want to put you through that, no matter how headstrong you were. It would have been painful for you.

“When he left, he was still undecided. He never came back for help, so I don’t know when it was that he made his decision. But by the time we found out, it was already too late. He had already dropped the bomb and left you alone at the airport that day. He ignored all of our calls as if he was punishing himself for everything. Isolating himself, cutting off everything he enjoyed in life—I daresay he regretted leaving you in pieces. But he returned to Japan the day of the dinner party where his father was planning on naming the official heir of the Ootori Corporation. Kyouya-senpai was to inherit the company.”

“Then why is he here?” Haruhi asked as Kaoru paused for a moment to drink the cool coffee. “What business does he have here?”

“He declined the position.” Kaoru said matter-of-factly. “And he was disowned by his father.”

Disowned—the word rung with unfamiliarity; he was disowned.

“I guess he realized that his life was worthless if he continued this way. Hurting the people he most cared about just to appease his father and hurting himself? It wasn’t worth it.”

“That doesn’t explain why he’s here,” Haruhi argued. “Or why you’re all here in his apartment.”

Kaoru sighed, “We found him that apartment. We’re here to monitor him.”

“Monitor him?” A thought rang in her head.

This was so unlike Kyouya. He didn’t need any monitoring—he did the monitoring! He was in charge of his life; he already knew where he was going…

“After he returned to Japan and found out that you were gone, he blamed himself and his existence. We decided that it was time for a change.” Seeing the appalled look on her face, Kaoru quickly said, “Mind you, we wanted to send him off somewhere else, but once he got over that stage of his life, he started to search for you. Frantically. And then when he found you, using the little resources he had—after all, being disowned by the Ootori family meant that he was a mere nobody even despite the businesses he was still in charge of—we couldn’t persuade him from seeing you.”

“Weren’t you the one who asked him why he rented the apartment?”

“Yes,” Kaoru gave a small laugh. He seemed amused at her question and at the fact that she remembered such a small detail. “It was to throw you off. Kyouya-senpai would never admit to being so weak as to ask for our help.”

“But his brother…?” Haruhi’s mind was racing a million miles per second. She remembered the desperate look in Kyouya’s eyes as he nearly begged her to help him help his brother. Was that all a lie?

“His brother was the one who did most to help him out of the ditch he was in,” Kaoru explained, looking weary. “His second brother really is in a pinch and Kyouya-senpai’s first instinct was to ask you for help because you were the only one he trusted with his brother’s case.”

There it was—that emotional, passionate side of Kyouya that made the callous, robotic side of him so human. On the outside, he was stone, but that once new and polished marble stone is beginning to age and crack, revealing someone…different. She knew now that the Kyouya that reflected in her eyes wasn’t the one that she fell in love with. The past Kyouya was so cold on the exterior and only slightly warm on the inside; does that mean the current Kyouya is a stranger?

Haruhi stopped her thoughts here. He was different. She was different. They have separated and grown apart in more ways than one…so why did she feel this longing to still be with him? He wasn’t the person she fell in love with, so why, why, why did she feel the same she did so long ago?

“Haruhi?”

“I’m sorry,” Haruhi said in a soft whisper. “I was lost in thought.”

Kaoru only smiled at her, patted her hand from across the low table, and repeated himself, “Kyouya-senpai said that there were only two reasons he was here.”

“Two?”

“He said that the first one was to help his brother,” Kaoru shook his head as he pulled away from her. “And that the second was to apologize. To you.”

She was silent for a moment, “Apologize?”

“He’s not asking for forgiveness,” Kaoru said hurriedly as if he somehow wounded or offended her. “He wanted to apologize for all of the pain he has caused you and to say good-bye.”

“‘Good-bye’?!”

“He won’t bother you ever again—”

“Please don’t say anymore,” Haruhi said, rubbing her temples lightly.

They were quiet; the only noises that could be heard were the last of the summer cicadas outside in a different world, a different time, a different dimension.

“He’s so selfish,” she murmured to herself

“Pardon?” Kaoru looked confused at her comment.

“That man,” her brown eyes flashed up at Kaoru, “is so selfish.”

Kaoru looked shocked for a moment before bursting out in hearty laughter. She waited as his laughter died down and he smiled at her, “Yes, I suppose he is.”

Haruhi stood and placed a hand on his cup, “I’ll refresh that. It doesn’t taste good when it’s cold.”

He stopped her and said soberly, “Do you still love him, Haruhi?”

She was silent for a moment before a loud knock came at the door. She hurried towards it and found Tamaki and Hikaru breathless.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, her attention completely on them.

“Mori-senpai and Hani-senpai,” Hikaru wheezed through his lungs, “they’re landing soon. They managed to get everything done and hurried here right away.”

“Hold on,” Haruhi stopped them as they tried to pull her out the door. “I can’t fit all of you in my car!”

“I suppose one or two of us can stay behind,” Kaoru suggested from behind her. “Tono*, why don’t you go along with Haruhi? Hikaru and I will stay behind and clean up.”

Clean up? Haruhi highly doubted that.

“Sounds good,” Hikaru agreed. “Go with her, tono.”

“Anything for my beloved daughter!” Tamaki breezed past Hikaru and hugged her tightly. “We must leave soon so that we do not keep our senpais waiting!”

She only managed to grab her wallet and her keys before Tamaki danced her out of her apartment. She barely had enough time to even lock her door before Tamaki pulled her out of the building and down to her car.

“All right, all right,” Haruhi laughed as she unlocked the doors. “We should hurry.”

They quickly drove onto the freeway and Haruhi reached over to turn on the radio before Tamaki placed his hand on hers. She gazed at him, slightly surprised, as he squeezed it tightly, his eyes focused on the blurry scenery outside. After a moment of silence, Haruhi was unsure whether she should pull away to prevent any misunderstandings when Tamaki said quietly, “He loves you, you know.”

She didn’t have to ask who he was talking about; she knew quite well that he was talking about Kyouya.

“I’m sure he does,” she said in a detached sort of voice as she pulled her hand away to turn on the radio.

“Haruhi,” Tamaki turned it off and grabbed her hand again. “I’m serious.”

Haruhi wasn’t quite sure what he wanted to hear. In fact, she wasn’t quite sure of anything. She knew she still had lingering feelings but what exactly were those feelings? At first, she was sure it was love, but since they were two completely different people, would it still be love? Or is she simply holding onto a shred of hope?

“I know Kaoru told you everything,” Tamaki continued. “Kyouya told us himself that he didn’t deserve you, over and over again. He said he wanted to let you go and stop putting you through agony. He wanted to say good-bye to you, but not because he doesn’t love you!”

“I know,” she said quietly, letting out a sigh. “Kyouya-senpai isn’t someone like that…”

“Stop calling him ‘–senpai’,” Tamaki demanded. “He’s more than that.”

Haruhi didn’t respond and he soon gave up, loosening her fingers and allowing her to turn on the radio. It wasn’t that she was trying to be difficult; she just didn’t know what to say anymore. All of these thoughts in her head and all of the words that had been spoken before meant nothing if it had been someone else…the only person she truly wanted to talk to right now was Kyouya.

It was there, that inkling of knowledge. Something inside of her head told her that she knew exactly what was going on with herself, with Kyouya, with them as a whole. But something in her just couldn’t accept it the way things are. They needed to talk everything through before she could remove that unwilling block from her mind.

Tamaki began talking at this point and she was secretly grateful of him for doing so. This distracted her mind from so many unpleasant memories and thoughts that ran a marathon of laps in her head. She just needed a little break, for a moment or two or three. Just forget everything now. She’ll think about it later.

They began chatting about the Suou Empire and its business as they waited at the luggage claim for their seniors. They were in a rather heated debate about the airport (Haruhi was sure this man was destined to be ignorant about the commoner “world” and to over-exaggerate everything) when a cute voice called out to them.

“Thanks for picking us up, Haru-chan*! Tama-chan!”

“Hani-senpai!” Tamaki waved enthusiastically as they made their way over to them. “Mori-senpai! How was your flight?”

Haruhi smiled at them as Hani began to tell Tamaki all about their flight (they, of course, flew on their private jet) and was pleasantly surprised to find Mori-senpai’s hand on her shoulder.

“How are you, Haruhi?”

Her eyes widened slightly as they watered (without any knowledge why) and she replied with a wavering voice, “I’m fine, thank you.”

Mori only gave her one of his knowing smiles and patted her on the head in comfort. She felt as if Mori knew exactly what she was going through and understood that she needed time to think things through (or in her case, to just mull it over and come to a conclusion later). He was always like a protective big brother who didn’t suffocate her with expectations or excessive thoughts. Being with him was like sitting outside on a nice day, free of life’s stress, just for a moment.

“Well, where are we going?” Haruhi asked them as they headed out to her car. “Are you staying at Kyouya-senpai’s place too?”

“No,” Mori answered in that usual quiet tone of his as Hani skipped alongside of Tamaki. “We are staying at the hotel.”

“We’re moving too,” Tamaki smiled at her. “I think Kyouya will be fine by himself now.”

Haruhi didn’t say anything in reply and instead ushered them quickly to the car where she drove them to their hotel, where Hikaru and Kaoru were waiting by a black Mercedes.

“Hey!” they waved to them as they made their way over. “It’s been a while, Hani-senpai. Mori-senpai!”

She gazed over at the black Mercedes curiously, noting that she’s never seen it before but it was familiar. She has seen plenty of black Mercedes Benz around America but somehow, they always reminded her of someone. She was still lost in thought when the driver’s door opened and out stepped (ha-ha, I should have seen it coming, she laughed to herself bitterly) Kyouya.

“Kyou-chan! It’s been a while!”

“Hani-senpai,” Kyouya greeted the loli-shota politely with a bow. He nodded to Mori-senpai in his cool and collected sort of way.

“Well then!” Kaoru said cheerfully as he started walking back inside. “I think it’s about time we checked-in and get settled. Don’t you think so, Hikaru?”

“Yeah,” Hikaru threw a suspicious glance at Kyouya. “I guess.”

“Okay!” Hani smiled up at Mori. “Let’s go!”

Haruhi wasn’t sure that she wanted them to leave or move out of Kyouya’s apartment. How was she going to think things through? And with him standing here no less!

“Haruhi…” Tamaki started.

“I should be getting back,” Haruhi said quickly before Kyouya could say anything. “I still have a lot of work to do. Take care—call me if you need me.”

She bowed to them hurriedly and turned away. She reached the safety of her car when she dared to gaze up. Haruhi found herself staring straight into dark grey orbs of emotion. And then all of a sudden, she felt the urge to say exactly what was on her mind—but she wasn’t sure exactly what she was thinking in the first place, so she clamped her mouth shut and forced herself into her car.

She still needed time to think things over. Haruhi wanted to be careful this time. When he left her, she still had the time to sulk but now that she was a lawyer with a very timely schedule, she couldn’t waste that time sulking if the same thing happened again.

She let out a sigh as she started up the engine. As she pulled away from the curb of the hotel, she didn’t notice the pair of onyx eyes filled with heavy emotions watching her leave.

--

Author’s Note:

- “Kyouya-senpai” The suffix -senpai is used for those higher than you. For example, an 8th grader would call an 11th grader "-senpai" Please note that Haruhi has reverted her speech back to how they were at Ouran.
- “Ootori-san” The suffix -san is used for those who are not close to you and is unisex.
- “Tono” is translated roughly into "lord" or "milord" and that's what the twins call Tamaki.
- "Haru-chan!" The prefix -chan is used for those either younger than you, or someone you are affectionately close to.

Feedback is really appreciated. Constructive criticism is also appreciated. Mean flames are retaliated with my evil dust kitties and their water furballs...so don't try them. You'll regret it. Really.

Thank you for reading!